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Mobile Frame Hangar • View topic - Twanks? Twanks!

Twanks? Twanks!

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Re: Twanks? Twanks!

Postby Atavism » Wed Apr 01, 2015 5:09 pm

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Re: Twanks? Twanks!

Postby Atavism » Thu Apr 02, 2015 11:49 am

It was cold. So terribly cold. A flashlight burns into Hezeraiah's eyes, dragging him back to unpleasant consciousness.

"Hey! Hey! We've got somebody out here! Get an emergency blanket, now! We've got to get him into the shelter!"

"Hutch that, only person stupid enough to get caught out here dressed like that is another Spyrius goon. Leave him!"

"He's still a human being! Just get him inside, Commander Blizzak can figure out what to do with him if he lives."

Hezeraiah felt himself being dragged. The world went dark.

---

"It's the curse of the Dread Pirate Twankus!" Alice shouted.

"Don't be rediculous," replied Dee. "We know for a fact that this emergent wormhole phenomenon is what took Hezeraiah."

"No, I mean, yes. I mean. The wormhole thing 'is' the curse of the Dread Pirate Twankus. This is what's been happening to my family for centuries!"

"That's just a fairy tale. Twankus' have all sorts of reasons for disappearing, besides, nothing ever came through like this time."

"That we know of! What if they vooped in when nobody was looking, or were similar enough that they could just take their counterpart's place?"

Dee wrinkled her nose, deep in thought.

Alice continued, "What if it's getting worse?"

---

Hezeraiah awoke, naked, in a vat of warm, softly glowing gel. Jagged clumps of his ice-shattered beard floated on the surface like lillypads. A man was seated next to him, flipping idly through an torn and dog-eared magazine. Hezeraiah didn't move, but examined the man out of the corner of his eye. He was an older man, with an snowy white mustache and bushy eyebrows. His leathery face was mottled with old, faded burns from cold exposure. He seemed well built, but his insulated suit made it hard to tell. His lips moved as he read an article.

Hezeraiah coughed phlegmatically, and a slow ripple worked its way down the gel. The man looked up from his magazine briefly, then returned to his place. Eventually he finished the piece he was reading and set the magazine down.

"So, you're awake."

Hezeraiah nodded.

"You with Spyrius?"

Hezeraiah coughed again, then croaked, "What's Spyrius?"

The man looked at him quizzically. "I'm Commander Blizzak. Yes, of 'that' Blizzak family. I run this sector. What is your name?"

"I am Hezeraiah S. Twankus," he replied, figuring it was better not to include his rank. "I seem to be lost."

Blizzak laughed heartily, and in a smooth motion pulled open a corrugated metal shutter. Blinding white light poured into the room, temporarily blinding Hezeraiah as his eyes adjusted to the glare.



"Well Mr. Twankus, welcome to Ice Planet!"
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Re: Twanks? Twanks!

Postby FragsturBait » Thu Apr 02, 2015 1:46 pm

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Re: Twanks? Twanks!

Postby Vitoria » Thu Apr 02, 2015 1:57 pm

There's no such thing as too much transparent orange!
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Re: Twanks? Twanks!

Postby Atavism » Thu Apr 02, 2015 2:27 pm

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Re: Twanks? Twanks!

Postby FrostCollar » Thu Apr 02, 2015 2:29 pm

Blue, white, and transparant orange have always been a striking combination. White, grey, trans blue for Exploriens? Please. Razzle dazzle on aliens? Not my thing.

A great theme and therefore a great set of Twanks.
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Re: Twanks? Twanks!

Postby Red_Robot » Fri Apr 03, 2015 4:20 pm

That is a TON of TNO.

I do agree, the market is ripe for a nostalgic revisiting of some of the older space themes. With all the transparent light blue they are cranking out for the Chima and Super Agents sets one could make some neato ice aliens right now.
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Re: Twanks? Twanks!

Postby DestinyPlayer » Fri Apr 03, 2015 4:23 pm

Is it just me, or does the left Ice Twank have an earless ushanka?
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Re: Twanks? Twanks!

Postby FrostCollar » Fri Apr 03, 2015 5:39 pm

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Re: Twanks? Twanks!

Postby Atavism » Fri Apr 03, 2015 10:20 pm

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Re: Twanks? Twanks!

Postby gusindor » Fri Apr 03, 2015 10:54 pm

Always bring a speech to a gunfight.
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Re: Twanks? Twanks!

Postby FrostCollar » Fri Apr 03, 2015 11:15 pm

Perhaps, but the kid in me call for a Roboforce reboot. The Robo Raider was great fun, and with an articulatable model as well as a secondary spaceship that could fly off it was near the platonic ideal of Lego sets for me. Just add a fully enclosed crew compartment and they'd be set.
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Re: Twanks? Twanks!

Postby Atavism » Sat Apr 04, 2015 9:25 pm

Alice and Dee sat alone in the lab.

"I just can't believe he's gone. Are you sure there's no way to get him back?"
"You saw what happened last time we tried to open the wormhole."
"Yeah."
"I don't even think it is stable. Whatever came through last time is not from the same universe as Cash and Ijad-Twankus."
"Yeah."
"Maybe if we could pinpoint where Hezeraiah ended up, but we don't even have the technology to try to look for him."
"Dee?"
"Yeah?"
"What if... just maybe... I'm not sure myself. But what if... we did?"

---



"So that's your enemy?"
"Yep."

The ambushers burst from a snowdrift, piling upon the Spyrius Twank with their burning orange mining saws. Hot bursts of steam and smoke froze into delicate snow as a man died.

"They don't seem to be a problem...?"
"He's alone. There's a lot more on the far side of the ridge. Ever since that bastard Major Fragstarr took out our little industrial spacedock we've had to resort to guerrilla warfare on our own turf."
"Isn't there anyone who will help you? Some sort of police force... or... who were your partners that you shipped ore to?"
"I'm not asking for help. What would we be if we went crying for help any two-bit space pirate come push us around?"
Hezeraiah absentmindedly stroked the air with his hand once, unable to resist the long habit of stroking his beard despite having jammed it all into a snowsuit. "You know," he said, "you remind me a great deal of my son."
"That so?"
"Indeed. He was a strong willed young man. Never backed down from a fight. Always wanted to do it on his own."
"What happened to him?"
"He loved War too much, and ended up where all men who love Her go."

---

"Coming from anyone else, I'd say that's a heap of slag you just told me."
"It's true! The All Seeing Omni Eye was what turned some scrap collecting Abel Twankus into the 'Dread Pirate Twankus.' He found it on some rock in the Oort Cloud along with a bunch of pictograms showing how to use it. It's supposed to let you see anything, really anything. The past, the future, anyone, anywhere."
"I thought that was just marketing."
"It's supposed to sound like that. It's all a deep, deep family secret that it actually works. I guess it goes without saying that you cannot tell anyone."
"If it is so secret, why are you even telling me? Why don't you just hop into Hezeraiah's Twank and turn it on?"
"It isn't that simple Dee. I... I need you to preform a surgery on me."
"What? What kind of surgery?"
"Dee, it really and truly is an eye. It isn't an analogy or a metaphor or whatever. And just like a real eye there's only one way to interface with it..."
"Oh... no..."
"Oh get over it, Dee. I was going to inherit the damned thing anyhow."

---

A thin red line of Spyrius Twanks worked their way down the snowy pass."
"I'm just hoping this works."
"It's fine, son, it will. You just wait."
"I don't like leaving this to some ally general. How is this supposed to work if I can't tell them when to go."
"Sometimes you have to trust other men to do your work."
The ugly red Twanks began to assemble into formations across the snowy plain. The Ice Planet Twanks were doing the same in their great burrows of snow. A gust of wind kicked up a looping curl of frost and for a moment the enemy disappeared.
"You know..." Hezeraiah began uncertainly, "My son would have been about your age by now."
Commander Blizzak began to reply, but a bright burst of blue plasma cut across their vision. Spyrius Twanks trundled across the barren field, randomly spraying the glacier with fire. As they drew near Ice Planet Twanks burst from hiding and returned fire with their own orange beams and saws. Slowly, they lost ground to the superior numbers of red Twanks. Armored hulls burst and melted as the sharp wind blew great streamers of smoke across the plain.
"Where are they?"
"They'll be here."
"We're losing, and we can't afford to lose it all. Not here. Not now."
The sky turned bright blue as a gate opened above the Spyrius formations. A dropship appeared and began discharging white and light stone grey Twanks as it screeched ever lower. The first few landed hard in the snow and became stuck. Their turrets spun wildly as they attacked any enemy that was near enough to fire upon. The next waves remained mobile and closely engaged the Syprius lines.



Emboldened, the Ice Planet Twanks charged their enemy, hammering away with mining equipment, some even ramming with their Twank's own battle scarred chassis.
Outnumbered and outmaneuvered, the Spyrius Twanks attempted to withdraw, only to find that the pass had been collapsed by infantry miners.
Hezeraiah turned to congratulate Commander Blizzak, but suddenly felt a sharp tug within himself. He only had time to say, "I'll miss you." Before-



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Re: Twanks? Twanks!

Postby FrostCollar » Sun Apr 05, 2015 12:08 am

Twanks just keep getting better! I've got fond memories of Exploriens too, Nebula Outpost was one of my favorite sets to play with at the time I had it.

The way you've distorted but not destroyed the classic Twank shape for their Twank is really cool, and I'd say that it's one of the best alter-Twanks so far!
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Re: Twanks? Twanks!

Postby DestinyPlayer » Sun Apr 05, 2015 7:39 am

Design of the new Twanks is really cool. The white and gray ones have that cool asymmetrical design.
Also, is it just me or this "Really bad thing" the squirrels were warning people of is Hezeraiah fixing them to the point of changing the cosmic balance, heh?
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Re: Twanks? Twanks!

Postby Atavism » Mon Apr 06, 2015 1:28 pm

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Re: Twanks? Twanks!

Postby FrostCollar » Mon Apr 06, 2015 2:08 pm

Also, don't think I didn't notice The Worm Farmer's Rebellion reference there with airdropped twanks getting their feet stuck in the ground!
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Re: Twanks? Twanks!

Postby z3r0 » Mon Apr 06, 2015 2:23 pm

We, ZL.Ltd., are very interested in the Twank design which is why we hereby propose our new design, the Tzank.
The goal of this new Frame is to offer a massive firepower for people who aren't afraid of spending a lot of money on a reliable machine.

While still in development, we can nevertheless give a few features :
Body d6W d6W
Main "Gigantor" cannon d6Ra d6Ra
Secondary "Dragon's breath" bi-cannon turret d6Rd d6Rd
Massive armor d6B d6B




Of course, we will inform General Hezeraiah Twankus of the use of his design but we're sure he will be as excited as we are.
ZL.Ltd. Reliable machines to have the dirty work done.
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Re: Twanks? Twanks!

Postby Atavism » Mon Apr 06, 2015 8:58 pm

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Re: Twanks? Twanks!

Postby Atavism » Mon Apr 06, 2015 11:44 pm

I had been wanting to build this for a while, but couldn't figure out how to do the Obliterator. The closest I had gotten was some big tires on the front, but I didn't like it much. I worked the whole night through before Easter, and had to be up for the holiday pretty quick that day, and apparently that's just the right amount of sleep deprivation help me come up with this:





Some comparison shots for scale:


And while I had my photo stuff set up:

The R&D Crew:




And this thing, which was probably the low point of sleepy creativity:

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